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Archived
March 26, 2006 - April 1, 2006
Saturday, April 1, 2006
I'd Hit It!
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Mmmm...
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Prilla
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posted by: Neo ©
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April
Fool's Joke
A little blind girl goes up to her mum and says,
"Mummy, mummy, when will I be able to see?" Her mum replies "I'll
tell you what, I'll take you to the chemist and get you some special cream
for your eyes and you will be able to see in the morning." So off
they went to the chemist, got the cream, and went home, all the while the
little girl was getting more and more excited at the prospect of being
able to see again. Once they got home, the mother put the cream on the
little girl's eyes, wrapped a bandage around her head, and took her to
bed. The following morning the little girl stumbled into her mums
bedroom and excitedly shouted "Quick mummy, take off the bandage so that
I will be able to see again." So the mother slowly took of all the
bandages, taking her time, and all the while the little girl was getting
more and more excited. Once they were off the little girl said "But mummy,
I still can't see." To which the mother replied, "April fool!"
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posted by: Neo
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Check This - AC Movie
Pass Review
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posted by: Neo ©
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Quote of the Week
| "The qualities that most attract a woman to a man are usually the same
ones she can't stand years later."
- Murphy's Law of Dating |
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posted by: Neo
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Antique Photos
This photo was done sometime in the late 1940's
or early 1950's (I think).
Technically, this pic is pretty boring - just
a snap-shot, so I'm not going to waste my time picking it apart.
Ok, let's talk about the model - First things
first - Purrrrrrrr. She is deffo a little Sex Kitten. WOW! She has a beautiful
face, nice body, nice legs, and great tits - with perfect round & hard
little nipples. The only thing I can complain about is that she does have
a little bit of a gut. - but who cares??? She is a very sultry vixen in
her high heels and thigh-high stockings. I love the platinum hair, and
I love the sexy look on her face that simply says - "I'm wild and sexy
and will give you the ride of your life. Wanna try me?"
I would soooo do her... Dang, I think I
just did.
This photo does not work for me, but the model
deffo does - Yummy!
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posted by: Neo ©
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| Friday, March 31, 2006
Adult
Erotica - Research
"How many applications do you think
we have now," Dr. Horton asked his research assistant, Doris Brewer!?!
"About fifty I'd guess," she replied while scanning the list, "and we have
a nice cross section of ages, all the way from nineteen up to sixty three!!!"
"Good," he said, "what's the breakdown on married and single!?!" "About
70-30," she replied, "with most of them being single!!!" "Hmmm, I wish
we had more married women participating in the survey," he opined, "but
I guess a lot of husbands wouldn't want their wives involved in something
like this, so we'll just have to make do with what we have, right!?!" "That's
right," Doris answered, "and if you're ready, our first candidate is waiting
in the outer office, should I show her in!?!" "By all means," he replied
enthusiastically, "but first give me her file so that I can review it!!!
"Hello, I'm Dr. Greg Horton, I'm
very happy to meet you, and you must be Miss Dvorak, please have a seat!!!"
The young woman nervously took a chair opposite Dr. Horton's imposing desk
and sat quietly with her arms folded on her lap while waiting for the doctor
to continue!!! After offering her a soft drink, Dr. Horton leaned back
in his chair and began, "Just so we understand each other, Miss Dvorak,
here at the Horton Labs we do advance research on human sexual response,
so if you were under some other impression I wanted to make our position
crystal clear!!!" In a somewhat quiet voice the young woman replied, "I
understand, and that's why I'm here!" "Good then," the doctor replied,
"I just want to verify some basic information on your form, such as your
age, you're twenty three and unmarried!?!" "Yes," she replied softly! "Are
you currently living with someone," he asked?!? "No," she replied, "but
I do have a steady boyfriend!" "I see," he said while noting that fact
on her sheet, "and do you have regular sexual relations with your friend!?!"
With her face turning a bright shade of crimson she replied, "Uh, a couple
of times a week!" "Intercourse and oral sex," he asked!?! "Both," she answered!!!
"Giving and receiving," he questioned?!? "Both," she replied again! "And
lastly," he asked easily, "sexually what is the most arousing for you,
by that I mean turns you on to the max!?!" After a moments hesitation she
replied, "I guess I'd have to say doing sixty nine!!!"
"Well that should about do it,"
Dr. Horton said while giving her chart one last glance, "now I'm sure that
Doris has explained to you what we're going to be doing, but I just want
to go over it one more time to make sure we're all on the same page," while
Anne Dvorak shook her head in the affirmative and waited for the doctor
to continue! "So, what we're measuring is the female arousal rate from
outside stimuli," he explained, "without any actual touching, just mental
stimulation so to speak, so attached to your body will be a series of electrodes
and probes designed to measure a host of reactions as your senses are flooded
with pictures, sounds, and videos of sexually arousing situations, do you
understand!?!" "I-I think so," she replied softly, "these sensors, will
they hurt!?!" "Not at all," he replied smiling, "most are held in place
with a soluble paste that comes off easily with warm water, while the probe
is simply a pencil size device that is inserted into your vagina which
I can assure you will cause you no discomfort what so ever!!!" "And by
the way," he went on, "if you are picturing yourself on a harsh examining
table, well don't, you will be reclining comfortably in a large easy chair,
we're trying to measure sexual response not suppress it, so if there are
no more questions are you ready to begin!?!" With a little shiver of fear
racing through her, Anne Dvorak nodded her head and replied with bravado,
"Okay doc, let's rock and roll!!!"
Doris led Anne Dvorak into the laboratory
where the experiments would take place and then ordered, "Okay, Anne, please
remove all of you clothing and then sit down in this reclining chair!!!"
While the young woman began taking off her things, she watched Doris out
of the corner of her eye getting the her equipment prepared!!! "That looks
pretty complicated," Anne opined while trying to keep things light, "I
can't get shocked from any of that can I!?!" "Of course not," Doris replied,
"all of the electrical connections are low voltage, you know, flashlight
type power, it's all perfectly safe!!!" "Well, good," she shot back jokingly,
"I don't wanna donate my body to science, at least not yet!!!" "We'll try
and remember that," Doris said while chuckling, "okay now, into the chair
so I can get you hooked up!!!
Twenty minutes later Dr. Horton
entered the room saying, "Is everything ready, Doris!?!" "Everything but
the vaginal probe, and I have that lubed up and ready to go," she replied
while carefully inserting it into Anne Dvorak, "there, that does it, all
ready to go!!!" The doctor sat down in a chair next to the recliner and
explained, "I just want you to know exactly what each connection is for,
Anne, these two are obvious, they're connected to you nipples and will
record in sensitivity in your breasts, while this belt on your right arm
will measure any change in your blood pressure!!!" Anne nodded that she
understood, while the doctor continued on, "Now this one on your temple
will record brain waves while the vaginal probe will measure lubrication
as well as any change in the size of your internal organs due to any change
in blood flow, while that camera overhead and attached to the ceiling will
record any changes in your external physical characteristics such as vaginal
lip puffiness as well as any change in your skin color!!!" After giving
her a reassuring pat on the arm Dr. Horton offered, "So, if you don't have
any other questions, let's get started!!!"
Sitting passively behind a large
panel of switches and dials, Doris waited for the doctor to give her the
signal to begin the experiment while he gave Anne one last bit of encouragement!!!
"Okay, Doris," he finally signaled, "start the slide show, please!!!" Reclining
comfortably in the large adjustable chair with her legs spread wide apart
and her arms resting at her side, Anne stared as images began appearing
on a twenty seven inch television screen sitting on a tall stand at the
foot of her chair!!! "What I want you to do is concentrate on every image
that comes onto the screen," the doctor said softly, as a picture of a
group of college age men in tight gem shorts playing basketball on a hot
summer afternoon followed in rapid succession by images of men performing
all sorts of sporting activities in bathing suits and athletic clothing!!!
Picture after picture popped onto the large screen with any change in Anne's
physiology being dutifully recorded by the monitors along the far wall!!!
As they moved along, Dr. Horton made notes on a yellow legal pad, but all
the time keeping a close eye on Anne Dvorak's response to the stimuli bombarding
her mind!!!
While the images of men performing
normal athletic activities were interesting to her, the monitors indicated
that Anne's response was normal and non sexual in nature, but gradually
the images grew more provocative as the men were posing totally naked in
front of her!!! Dr. Horton looked over to Doris who nodded to indicate
the pictures of naked men had definitely caused the young woman's heart
rate to climb by nearly ten beats per minute, but it was when images of
young men with large erections came onto the screen that there was a change
in her breathing as it became more shallow and intermittent!!! For the
next five minutes or so, Anne was shown a variety of men in all shapes
and sizes, but with one identical feature, that being that they all were
in a state of total erection!!! While is was evident that the images of
erections was having an arousing effect on her, it wasn't until the next
series of photos that Anne Dvorak moved to the next stage excitement!!!
While all of the images up until
now had only contained pictures of men, the ones following were much more
graphic in nature, as Anne Dvorak soon found out!!! She made an audible
gasp as the first photo of a young man with a murderous erection appeared,
only this time there was an attractive young woman on her knees fellating
him!!! "Oh my," she gasped while image after image showed very attractive
woman on their knees sucking these monster erections, "oh, that looks so
nice," she whispered under her breath!!!" While Anne was staring at each
image that popped up on the screen, Dr. Horton slid silently to the foot
of the recliner where he could get an unobstructed view of her vagina,
and what he observed wasn't surprising at all, as she was dripping with
Bartholin's fluid and her lips were flushed and open, obviously being in
a state of extreme sexual arousal!!! Giving Doris a thumbs up, the images
of oral sex quickly changed to those same young women instead being on
their knees sucking to them being on their backs being impaled by some
of the most massive erections she had ever seen!!! As the doctor made notes,
Anne Dvorak gasped louder this time and moaned out loud, "Mmmm, I'm on
fire, j-just look at her, she's getting the fucking of her life, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.........."
And just to verify what she was looking at, Dr. Horton made a note of the
image that was having such a profound effect on her, that being a young
man of twenty or so with a huge thick erection having intercourse with
a tiny blonde woman whose vagina looked like it was being torn to shreds
by the monster invading it!!!
Normally by now, Anne would have
already moved her hand to her clitoris and frigged her self to an orgasm,
but with her hands limp at her side the fury in her vagina just seemed
to build and build with no relief in sight!!! Again Dr. Horton checked
her vagina, and again he noted the distended lips and profusion of juice
that was pouring from her puffy labia!!! As he returned to his place by
her side, he again signaled Doris who with a flip of a switch changed the
still images to change to a brutally obscene porno movie accompanied by
sound that showed a young brunette riding a huge penis and swearing like
a drunken sailor!!! "Oh my god," Anne groaned, "she's fucking riding his
stump, oh god she's gonna cum, just look at her, how lucky can a girl get!!!"
The movie ran for ten minutes or so with different scenes and different
actors, but with the same general theme, that being young women getting
fucked by big cocks with both the men and the women having huge crushing
orgasms!!! Anne was now begging for relief, but much to her dismay, the
screen went black for several seconds, only to be filled with a video of
a young man and woman doing a very good job at some hardcore sixty nine!!!
"Oh, fuck," Anne Dvorak screamed,
"p-please help me, let me cum, I can't stand it another second, please,
help meeeeeeeeeee," as the image and sound of the two porno stars cumming
in each other's mouths burned into her mind, Anne's vagina convulsed violently
as an involuntary orgasm turned her entire body into one gigantic erogenous
zone!!! Covered in sweat and shaking like a leaf in a gale, Anne Dvorak's
pussy twitched in a post orgasmic glow that continued on unabated for a
good ten minutes after her thunderous climax!!! Dr. Horton made several
final entries on his pad before announcing, "That was a good session, Anne,
thank you for your participation!!!" Now barely able to speak she whispered,
"All I can say, doc is, wow!!!
THE END
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Porn Jester's
Erotic Stories - Uncensored, Rare & Raunchy, Adult Erotica.
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Illustrated
Erotic Tales
For Sci-Fi Erotica, Gothic
Horror Stories, Tales of Death
and Sexy Detective Stories, Check
Out:
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posted by: Neo ©
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Check This -
Adult Movie Page
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posted by: Neo ©
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Naughty Lesbian Pics
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posted by: Neo ©
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Porn Jester
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Check This - Indian
Women
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posted by: Neo
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Featured
Artist - Patty @ A Creative Spanked Wife
Click
Here for More From A Creative Spanked Wife
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posted by: Patty © 2006
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Friday Funnies
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Thursday, March 30, 2006
Japanese Shunga
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posted by: Neo
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Check This - Live
Streaming Videos
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posted by: Neo
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This Week's Chain E-Mail
| Subject: How to come home drunk.
Martin wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open
his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass
of water on the side table. He sits up and notices his clothing in front
of him, all clean and pressed. Martin looks around the room and sees that
it is in perfect order, spotless and clean. So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. "Honey, breakfast
is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You…
So he goes to the kitchen and, sure enough, there is a hot breakfast
and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Martin
asks, "Son, what happened last night?"
His son says, "Well, you came home around 3 a.m., drunk and delirious.
You broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black
eye when you stumbled into the door."
Confused, Martin asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean,
and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"
His son replies, "Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when
she tried to take your pants off, you said, 'Get your hands off me, bitch!
I'm married!'"
Moral of the Story:
Breakfast... $10
Self-induced hangover... $100
Broken furniture... $2,000
Saying the RIGHT thing to your wife when you're drunk...
PRICELESS... |
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posted by: Neo
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Somnophilia - Sex with Innocent
Sleeping Girls
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posted by: Neo ©
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UpDates & Reviews
"Sex-Fi.
Erotic Sci-Fi, Goth & Horror Sex Stories" - Erotic science
fiction, goth & horror illustrated sex stories. Featuring aliens, monsters,
sexy babes and more. Plus 3D cartoon galleries, live chat and XXX movies.
"Sex-Fi" is a "CyberSex
Prestige" site and is REALLY one of my favorite sites.
I love the design of the splash pages. And yes, I designed them
myself - "Thank you." The site had seven galleries of 3D animation, adult
comix and illustrated erotica. Plus 20 different sci-fi & horror sex
stories. I have also recently added 13 New Erotic Goth Tales, 25 Sex Tales
of the Old West, and a new "Dark" Sci-fi Serial Comic. Anyway, the site
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and dark horror & erotic goth stories then you really should give "Sex-Fi"
a try. Really you should! Really! Really! Do it now! :o)
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Latina Teens, Naughty Latina Schoolgirls, Sexy Latina Cheerleaders, Sweet
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Latina Teens" Site design is ok. It's easy to navigate and there
are no hidden links, no pop-ups and certainly there is none of that other
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olds) spreading their creamy brown legs, showing pink and masturbating.
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School Sluts" - The Girls you wanted in school, get naked
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dressed up as teens!
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Sluts" Site design is good. Easy to navigate, etc., etc.. This site
is filled with sweet & slutty Schoolgirls and Cheerleaders in uniform.
There are Hidden Cam galleries (so you can spy on Schoolgirls while they
change their clothes and do the stuff that Schoolgirls do), and there are
also UpSkirt galleries (so you can finally get a good look under that sexy
little Cheerleader uniform). Remember when you were in school and you soooo
wanted to fuck, or at least date, the Cheerleaders and most of the time
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their legs and showing you just what you always wanted to see.
"Nude
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"Porn
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Plus,
they're both "Adult
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you become an AC member, you get FREE access to ALL the Porn Jester sites,
PLUS you also get FREE access to over 300,000 other high quality Adult
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posted by: Neo ©
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Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Fetish
Wear & Bondage Gear by Eros Boutique
The Fetish Wear, Thigh High Boots, Ball Gag & Bondage Gear were
supplied for the photo shoot by
Eros
Boutique – a great place for all your sexual pleasures- Eros
Boutique. Click on the link and check it out.
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posted by: Neo ©
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Face Down, Ass Up is How
We Like to Fuck
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posted by: Neo ©
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Tramp Stamps
Tramp Stamps
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posted by: Neo ©
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Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Pervert
Jack
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Poetry -
Thinking of You
| THINKING OF YOU
LIGHTNING FINGERS ACROSS THE SKY
SECONDS PASS
THUNDER RUMBLES
LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW
I THINK OF YOU
THE CLOUDS CRY
TEARS WASH DOWN THE PANE
LIGHTNING CRACKS
THE WIND WHIPS
THUNDER BOOMS
NO SECONDS PASS
THE CLOUDS CRY
TEARS BEAT DOWN THE PANE
LOOKING THROUGH THE WINDOW
I THINK OF YOU |
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posted by: Elsie Bee ©
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Check This
- Hidden Cam Stories
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posted by: Neo ©
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Sexy Cartoons &
Pin Ups
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posted by: Neo ©
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Movie Tuesday
Tonnes of Great Adult Movies & Sexy Hardcore
Videos in Every Flavour...
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posted by: Neo ©
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Monday, March 27, 2006
Monday Toons
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Three
Dirty Jokes
1.
An 80 year old woman was arrested for shoplifting. When she went before
the judge he asked her, “What did you steal?” She replied: “A can of peaches.”
The judge then asked her how any peaches were in the can. She replied “6.”
The judge then said, “I will give you six days in jail.” But before the
judge could pronounce the punishment, the woman's husband spoke up and
said, “She also stole a can of peas.”
2.
Q. What begins with an “F” and ends with “UCK”?
A. Fire truck
3.
A guy went into a bar and met a nice girl. They have a few drinks and soon
wound up at his place, in bed. They're having a great time. She was on
top when suddenly she had an epileptic seizure; she was shaking and foaming
at the mouth. Our uninformed male thought this was incredible - best
sex he'd ever had. He finished, but she is still shaking and thrashing
about with her seizure. He began to get nervous and took her to the
emergency room. A nurse asked what the problem was and he replied, "I think
her orgasms stuck!"
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posted by: Neo
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Check This - Triple
X Cams
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posted by: Neo ©
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Sunday, March 26, 2006
Blogger Babe - Anika
Anika's a 19 year old, 5'8, 120 lb very sexy, strawberry blonde cutie
with very pretty greenish-grey eyes, nice lips and a smooth complexion.
She has a nice figure (34A-24-34), tiny, tiny boobs with nicely shaped
pink little nipples, a flat stomach, long, long legs, a nice round butt,
a great cum-fuck-me doggy-style arch and a completely shaved, pink little
pussy (see this week's Blogger Babe Pic).
An agent sent Anika's pic to me and as soon as I saw it I deffo knew
that she would be great for a shoot. I got her number, gave her a call,
talked with her on the phone for about an hour (laughing, flirting, etc.)
and finally got around to setting up an interview for the following day.
She showed up late for the interview. Got lost. After all she is a blonde
- well, strawberry blonde, so I guess maybe that doesn't count. Anyway...
right from the start we got along. We talked a lot, laughed a lot, flirted
a lot and yes, not only did I want to hire her, but I also liked her. Yes,
she was young, sexy and sweet (with a sultry side), but that is not why
I liked her. Well, yeah, those are deffo reasons why I liked her, but I
really liked her because she was goofy and she made me laugh. I'm deffo
a sucker for a girl with a good sense of humor. Anyway, after she left,
I called my partner, Big Lou, and told him about her. We decided to hire
her for our next shoot.
Anika showed up for the shoot. Late, (blonde) but at least she showed
up. The shoot went ok... She had only a few hours to work with us before
she had to leave, so between the flirting and joking around we were actually
rushing to get the work done. And of course, when you rush and you're limited
on time you don't get as much done as you would like. But we still shot
quite a bit and did get some good stuff. In a little under four hours we
shot six set-ups including; cheerleader
(with combat boots), schoolgirl
(with high heels), 50's
type bathing suit (with high heels), a Goth
outfit (with Black, 6 inch, thigh-high boots and a whip), a stewardess
outfit, and last but not least, we shot a voyeur
scene.
While shooting the stewardess scene Anika actually fell asleep. In the
middle of the scene I started talking to her - asking her to change her
pose and she didn't respond. After a moment, I realized that she was sound
asleep. LOL. Turns out she worked the night before and was quite tired.
Well I woke her up, we took a break for lunch, got some food into her and
then she was fine. Dang, she was so fine. The next scene we did was the
schoolgirl scene. WOW! She has very long legs, was wearing very tall heels
and a very short schoolgirl skirt and as I mentioned before, she has a
great cum-fuck-me doggy-style arch. So needless to say... and this rarely
happens (because I'm a professional), but I started to feel a little twinge
of excitement from between my legs. Now, can you just imagine how hot a
girl has to look to make a professional photographer (like me) lose his...
uh... concentration? Rhetorical question. Anyway, just take my word for
it... when she got on her hands and knees, arched her back and gave me
that sultry, cum-fuck-me, innocent, but very slutty, schoolgirl look, I...
well, let's just say that I almost had to go change my pants. LOL.
The day after the shoot Anika called and wanted to come over and look
at her pics, but I was in the middle of another shoot and did not have
the time to meet with her, so we talked about getting together at a later
date to look at the pics and also to do some more work together - both
adult and non-adult. So, hopefully we will stay in touch... I'll let you
know.
If you want to see more of Anika, check out "Triple
X Cams," and of course "Porn
Jester's White Girls."
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posted by: Neo ©
.
Always Looking for Girls, Girls,
Girls to Photograph!
I'm shooting a lot right now and I'm deffo looking for girls to photograph,
so... If you're female, OVER 18 YEARS OF AGE, in the LA area, very
cute and/or good looking and/or HOT, and are interested in posing nude
for my websites, your own websites, for fun or just for some nice artistic
photographs, please e-mail me with a description
of yourself and a URL address where I can see a photo of you. If you're
what I'm looking for, then you'll deffo hear back from me :o)
Please DO NOT send photos or files attached to your e-mails.
They will be deleted!
.
posted by: Neo ©
.
Looking for Adult Artists & Writers
If you're an artist and/or writer and would like to have your work featured
here on Sex Blogger or one of
my other Adult Story or Cartoon Sites: "Sex-Fi.
Erotic Sci-Fi & Horror Sex Stories," "Cuntoons,"
"Pregnant Comix,"
"Erotic
Pregnant & Plumper Stories," "Sex
Tales of the Old West," "Triple
X Toons," "Kinky
Komix," "Illustrated
Erotica" or one of the new Erotic Story or Adult Cartoon sites that
I'm building, then please feel free to e-mail
me with a SHORT sample of your writing or a URL address where I
can see your work. As far as subject matter goes, I'm really interested
in erotic Sci-Fi, Horror, Gothic, War and Crime stories and/or artwork
in the same genera's. I'm also interested in material that is unique unto
itself. If you send me a short sample of your writing, please spell
check and proof read it before submitting it. I know that I'm not the best
with grammar, but if your sample is full of misspelled words and the grammar
and punctuation are noticeably worse than mine, it won't even be considered.
:o)
Please, DO NOT send photos or files attached to your e-mails.
They will be deleted!
.
posted by: Neo ©
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Comments & Opinions
I would love to hear from you. Please e-mail
me with your comments, opinions and/or any suggestions you may have regarding
Sex
Blogger.
.
posted by: Neo ©
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